a time & a season (part IV of IV)
Oh my friends. It’s time. Time to post about the impending arrival of a new little one in our family.
I will be careful in writing this, and probably sit with it a few days to make sure I’ve communicated everything clearly.
I am going to tell this part of the story using excerpts and dates from my prayer/quiet time journal.
November 6th, 2012
“I’ve decided to record in writing a secret that has started to take root in my heart… adoption. With three very active children of my own already, I wonder if I am a little crazy. And then, I realize how crazy Jesus seemed to people, and I feel a little better.”
August 22nd, 2013
Up until this time, I had kept this secret in my heart. I had shared it with about 2 other very close friends, but I was hesitant to share with Matt because his heart was not ready for it. He knew it was there for me, it just wasn’t there for him.
On this day, I told him my “fishing” story… how the Lord hooked me for adoption in the first place. It was a big deal, because I didn’t realize he was in the dark on all of that, and he didn’t realize that there was so much more to my desire than he knew.
September 9th 2013
“Adoption, adoption… will it ever be for us? I see their faces, I read their stories, and my heart hurts. Lord! Why have you placed this burden on my heart? You have been SO faithful to show me the goodness of your timing. Speak comfort over me as I continue to walk in faith!”
**Later that day the door opened for my mom & I to sponsor a set of twin boys in a foster home in China.**
October 2nd, 2013
At this point the Lord started putting the desire in our children, too. Albeit, in a more childlike way of understanding!
“Yesterday Rachel commented she thought when she gets a Chinese sister, we should name her Mary because, ‘it’s a nice name.'” 🙂
October 15th, 2013
A difficult day in which the Lord asked me what/who I loved more after reading 2 Peter 3:9 — The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness… The end result was giving my dream over to Him. Completely. And, as I’ve seen happen so often, this point marks the time when I started to see small but perceptible changes in Matt’s outlook on the question of adoption as well.”
“Lord, you know me better than I know myself, I know you know exactly where my heart went when reading these verses!”
“I know adoption is your heart; you adopted me into YOUR family. But… is it your will for MY family??”
“I have handed over SO much control with this…”
“And yet now, I wonder if you want me to lay my dream at your feet, too.” (at this point, the Lord had gently spoken to me about Abraham & Isaac, and the sacrificial love of Abraham)
“Lord, I beg you to not take this, I want to be a part of your rescue. I know I can’t fake it, the words, the heart…”
October 26th, 2013
This was the day of the Chosen Half Marathon I ran to support the adoption of some friends of ours. And the verse I meditated on that day?
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes form the Lord, who is the Spirit.” 2 Cor. 3:17-18
***Umm…AMAZING… and the verse my blog is named for! Where the Spirit is, there is freedom!
Freedom to be a little crazy…
freedom to say YES to what God has for you, KNOWING that it may not be the easy path! ***
And then one day (in my shock I totally forgot to record it!)…
Matt. Said. YES.
It was casual, it was in reference to some other plans we were making… and I did a double-take.
“When did this change?”
“I don’t know, it just grew.”
THAT, my friends, is the result of earnest prayers of many saints over the course of a year and a half.
It is the result of being submissive to my husband, while letting him know what was on my heart. I was never pushy, or demanding… because it had to be the work of the Spirit. NOT the work of me trying to play the role of the Spirit.
And… here we are! Hands opened, waiting for what the Lord has next. Taking steps to complete the paperwork necessary to go get our DAUGHTER in China! I don’t know where she is, or who she is, but I know she is there, and she is waiting for us.
I can’t help but give a girly squeal every now and then when it hits me all over again. This is REAL! We are really doing this! Thank you, Jesus!
P.S. – I will answer some FAQ we seem to be getting in another post.