“what if”

I’m not normally a “what-if-er”.  I know the type because I have been the type.

Over time I’ve realized that what-if-ing is just a


And then, our adoption process began.

And our home-building process began.

AND we felt that ‘now’ (being the 2014-2015 school year) is the time to homeschool our oldest for a year.

All.  At.  Once.

And y’all, the what-ifs are showering down.  But not in the way you might think!

I wonder..

What if the reason we are building this one-level house NOW (rather than after the adoption, which was honestly what “my” plan was)… what if it’s because the Lord knows our daughter will have trouble with stairs?  What if she has trouble walking?  Or has a vision problem?  Or has any number of conditions that could make having stairs difficult?

What if?

I wonder…

What if the reason we are homeschooling is because the Lord knows that Rachel will need the extra one-on-one attention before giving up the title of Sole Girl Child. What if He knows that she will be going with us to China, and having the flexibility of homeschool will make that easier?  What if He knows that I need this time to learn how to focus on being a homeschool mom because my Chinese daughter will need to be home schooled?

What if?

I wonder…

What if the reason ALL of this fell together RIGHT NOW is because SHE is out there.  SHE has been born and SHE will be ready for us sooner than we ever thought?

All very exciting what-ifs!!

The only what-ifs that have never crossed my mind?

What if this is all wrong? What if we are making a mistake?

These what-ifs are from my Enemy, and I will not listen.

Greater is HE who is in me than he who is in the world.  (1 John 4:4)

One thing I know for certain, no what-ifs about it, is that the Lord has great things in store. (Jer. 29:11)  He has great lessons to be learned, experiences to be had, and trust to be formed.

I. Can’t. Wait.


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