the disconnect (a painful football metaphor)
Confession: I don’t know a whole lot about football. I mean, I know the basics, but when I’m watching a game (and I do use the word “watching” very loosely..) with the Hubs and he yells “offsides”…. well… I didn’t catch that. I have no idea what that means, or which player moved or didn’t move the way they were supposed to.
With that said, I’m asking for a little indulgence as I hammer out a football related metaphor that has been brewing in my mind this afternoon.
The pre-game show. You know it? Yes, it’s true. There is actually MORE football before the football even starts. Discussions, wagers, making picks, sizing up the teams… it’s all a part of the “experience”.
It’s not the game, but for a diehard, it’s a necessary part of the game.
I kinda feel a little bit like this whole “pre-adoption” period is seen by many as the “pre-game show”.
It’s not the GAME. We don’t have our child home with us yet. Really all we are doing is filling out paperwork and waiting (on repeat). There IS a lot of discussion. There IS some making picks (if travel dates are picks…) and sizing up timelines etc…
On the outside, the clock hasn’t started yet. The refs aren’t on the field. The players are still warming up.
But in my mind I feel like it’s like the Superbowl and there’s a whole stadium of people watching and cheering and talking about what’s going on down on the field.
I’ve kind of grown to dislike the term “pre-adoption”. Let’s just agree to say it’s all adoption, whether you have the child in your home yet or not. Because my mind is not in a “pre” state of being, and our family is not in a “pre” state of being.
We are working out logistics for the coming months. We are coping with a current youngest who is really struggling with the fact that we will be gone for two weeks and has been demonstrating this inner turmoil by acting out. We are not making dinners because we forget (and by “we”, I mean “me”, and I am super thankful to have a bar-b-que place around the corner!). We are looking at the 6th stocking hanging by the fireplace and realizing this time, next year, will look vastly different (in a good way!). We are finishing required education for our agency, we are sending care packages and photo albums to a little girl who is about to have her world rocked. We are wondering how we will ever manage to do laundry for 6 when laundry for 5 is barely happening (again… that’s a “me” thing!)
My friends, there is no “pre” about this season of life.
We are full steam ahead, and in a few weeks, we’ll be playing with another player on our team. She’s not going to understand the team. She’s not going to even realize that teams exist. But she’ll be a part of ours, and we’ll have to teach her what life is like on the field. And there will be people watching, and cheering for her and for us.
And that is the part of the game I’m ready for. Enough of of this full contact pre-game show.
Let’s play ball. (which I fully realize may be a baseball thing) 😉